Stop Glorifying Lazy Days
There’s a trend on social media that everyone seems to love: bed rotting. Whole days spent under the covers, endlessly scrolling through Instagram and TikTok, calling it “self care” while everyone else’s filtered lives flash past. Reels romanticise it, influencers make it seem essential, and suddenly doing nothing has become the standard for rest.
Except here’s the truth: it isn’t rest. Real downtime fills you up; bed rotting drains you. It doesn’t clear your head, reset your energy, or give you the sense of rest it promises.
Last week, I fell straight into it. After months of constantly being on, work, socialising, travelling, planning the next step, I thought I deserved a break. But my quiet days quickly turned into hours of scrolling, avoiding the world, and feeling guilty for not doing more. I know, logically, that the lives I see on Instagram are curated and mostly performative. And yet, even knowing that, I still felt this strange restlessness, not because my life is lacking, but because those manufactured reels make it feel like I should be doing something else. That constant sense of needing to be somewhere different, doing more, achieving faster, it’s exhausting. Maybe that’s what makes your twenties so confusing: knowing you have enough, but still feeling like you’re falling behind. By Friday, I was more drained than Monday morning, not from activity, but from the mental weight of existing while scrolling.
Living in Vietnam has taught me how to be more present, to actually notice things, to move through my days without rushing to the next. But, I slipped back into an old habit, resting like I’d switched myself to airplane mode, still scrolling, but cut off from real life.
Here’s what I’m starting instead:
Coffee and awareness: Go for coffee, bring a book, leave the phone in my bag.
Walking without distraction: Hit my 10k steps, no music, no podcasts, just me and the streets of Saigon.
Running again: Move my body not to tick off goals, but because it makes me feel so much better.
Creative time: Painting, writing, doing something tactile that brings joy without a screen.
Balance in socialising: Finding my rhythm between energy giving people and genuine alone time.
Being present: Not thinking about the next trip, the next career step, or what success should look like. Just enjoying time with myself.
Yesterday was a perfect example. Coffee with a book and my phone safely tucked away, a run around Thao Dien, exploring the War Remnants Museum, had lunch with one friend, drinks with another, and even with all that, I felt fulfilled and actually rested. It left me able to enjoy a lie-in today, ready for the work week. Real rest isn’t about doing nothing; it’s about filling up your own cup.
Why it matters
When I first moved to Vietnam, I didn’t take rest days. I was too busy adjusting to a new city, learning the streets, figuring out my routine, meeting new people. I was running around like a mad women, but it made me genuinely happy, with my phone mostly tucked away and my screen time under an hour. That pace isn’t sustainable long-term, at the time though, it kept me connected to my life.
Now that things have slowed down, I’ve realised that rest days can easily turn into a trap. Lying in bed scrolling feels easy, it requires no thought, no effort, no decision-making. Life is tiring, I get it. But there are so many ways to slow down and actually recharge. Of course downtime looks different for everyone, some people recharge with a trip to the cinema, others by hiking in the mountains. We live in such a judgemental world where every hobby seems to get criticised as silly or too weird, but honestly, if it makes you happy (within reason), then do it. The point isn’t what you do, it’s that you show up for your own day in a way that actually fulfils you.
The problem is, we’ve forgotten who we are and how to be with ourselves. I don’t mean the “go find yourself in Bali” kind of way, I mean genuinely tuning in, figuring out what makes us happy outside of work, outside of validation. We’ve become a quick-fix society, addicted to easy dopamine and constant distraction. Twenty second reels feel too long now. We fill silence with noise, stillness with screens, and wonder why we feel empty.
Rest doesn’t have to be complicated; it’s about reconnecting with yourself, your surroundings, and the little things that make you feel alive. I want to slow down without disappearing and to take breaks that actually recharge me. I want balance, to be fully present whether I’m with people or alone. Most importantly, I want to stop living for the next thing, the next trip, the next plan, the next career step. Success stresses me out more than anything. Yet here I am, letting bed rotting convince me it counts as rest. I tell myself I’m recharging, but really I’m just putting off the energy I need to grow and move forward. For someone so driven, letting this habit stall my own development feels absurd. The real challenge isn’t just slowing down, it’s finding ways to rest that actually fuel me without blocking my progress.
Maybe that’s why Oscar Wilde said it best: “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” Last week, I was existing. Bed rotting might look like rest, but it’s really just disconnecting from the life I want to lead.
This week’s post is a bit different just me reflecting on what I’m doing right and wrong, and sharing my thoughts in case it helps someone else.
With love from Saigon,
Anaïs